Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Too Long, Too Late


Two years. That's how long the preparations took. Weekly indoctrinations by dedicated volunteers, regular readings, self-discovery, the list goes on. Two years can be a burden for some. As expected, a number from his batch dropped out.

Those left standing were deemed true to their intentions. And last night, all, including my life partner, were reborn of water and the Word. It is inspiring to see them heed His call and embrace the faith. I was simply born into it.

The narcissistic in me wanted to take the credit, insinuating my partner was influenced by the virtues and values that I demonstrated in our relationship. But I, an example of selfishness and pride, knew better.

I watched him quietly. Eyes closed, deep in prayer, awash with emotion, thankful. I had a fleeting recognition of myself from a distant past. I smiled sadly. I can't remember the last time I truly experienced Him. It's been too long, and maybe too late.

With the sign of the cross, my mid-aged husband opened his eyes and beamed at me. I smiled. It is never too late. Perhaps I too can still be reborn in my faith.

Happy Easter to all.

photo from here

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Hiling


Isinuot ko sa siwang ang nakatiklop na kapirasong alay mula sa aking bulsa. Kumuha ako ng isa mula sa nakasalansang mga kandila at ipinatong ito sa hilerang pedestal. Isa, dalawa, tatlong kiskis bago nagliyab ang ulo ng posporo na aking inilapit sa mitsang agad namang umapoy.

Nagsimula itong malusaw at inilantad ang angking kabalintunaan. Ang natunaw na kandila ang siyang tumutustos sa apoy na tumutupok dito, ngunit ito rin ang nagpapahaba sa buhay ng maikling mitsa nito.

Hindi dapat ako dadalaw. Nandito rin ako noong isang taon. Meron akong hiling, na sinabayan ko na rin ng pamamakyaw ng mga miraculous relics, misa at dasal. Humingi ako ng himala, ang pagsalba ng isang buhay, ngunit hindi ito ipinagkaloob sa akin. Sumama ang loob ko, at ito ay ikinahihiya ko.

Pinagmasdan ko ang kandila. Unti-unti itong naglawa. Nang tumulo ang unang patak, di na rin napigilan ang pagdausdos ng mga sumunod. Dinukot ko ang panyo sa aking bulsa at ipinahid ito sa aking mga pisngi.

Ngayon ko lang naintindihan. Hindi man ito ang aking hiniling, sapat na tibay ng loob ang himalang aking natanggap upang ang sakit ay aking kayanin.

Have a blessed week.

photo credit: popseoul.com
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